22nd nov just becaue i resolve to do something healthy doesn't necessarily mean i will commit to it. >:(

21st nov i've realised i'm not ready to be in a relationship and probably won't be for a while. it's difficult to accept because it's what i want more than anything, but i need to get myself under control before i share my existence with another person. i think people can tell that i'm not ready

20th nov it's difficult to build healthy coping mechanisms but it's definitely my responsibility. it's not my fault, but it's still my responsibility to improve. i just woke up with a very mellow feeling. i don't wanna be alone but i really do.

19th nov i'm typing this with one hand as i pet a kitty. i can already feel my mind clearing up. things have this dull brightness now, like moon glittering on a body of water. i got this new app, how we feel, which is meant to track my moods.

18th nov this is not a project of creativity but rather one begotten by my huge, bruised ego, evergrowing, evermore bruised, in search of a cave which was discovered precisely because i constructed it.